Epiphany by Way of Lilly Pulitzer

This week, I had an e-mail exchange with my ex-sister-in-law. She and I get along very well, so it wasn't a 'grrrowl' kind of conversation. It was more of a 'hey - haven't talked to you in a while and wanted to see how you're doing' type of conversation. Admittedly, I haven't reached out in a while. I've been somewhat happily distracted with trying to restrain myself from buying every baby item in sight for my niece Lily (and failing miserably), and with the growing relationship I have with Manfriend.

During this pleasant e-mail exchange, I found out that the ex will be hosting Thanksgiving at his house. This elicited three reactions from me: surprise, laughter (because I can't imagine the ex getting together any sort of holiday feast) and a lot of hurt feelings. The third reaction caught me off-guard. It was a very 'when Harry met Sally' moment. I sat there and stared at the words in the e-mail and thought to myself in all the years we were married, I can't really remember a time where he actively wanted a family gathering at our house. Then I realized - that's because he didn't want holidays at our house. He wanted them at his house. With his family.


For every moment I feel like I'm on track and that I am past all of the heartache, something like this surfaces. And, peeps, I gotta tell you: It sucks.

I needed something to pull me out of the funk, and as fate would have it, retail therapy helped me. On Saturday, I went with my cousin's wife and her friend to the Lilly Pulitzer warehouse sale. I've never owned a single piece of Lilly Pulitzer clothing. The line is very bright, and laden with pinks and greens. Very girly-meets-golfpro. I'm feminine, and very much like being a girl, but I wouldn't describe my style as preppy in the least.

The warehouse sale opened my eyes to a new perspective. Sure, there were the pink-and-green-paisley-flowery-overloaded pieces, but there were also bold, feminine solids and prints, too. I was pleasantly surprised, and managed to walk away with some really nice pieces for myself, as well as for my niece (yep - failed to restrain myself) and for my friend's five year old daughter.

I also walked away realizing it's okay to be sad. It's okay for me to be irritated. But it's also time to turn over a new leaf. Why wallow in the past, when the past wasn't that great? Why live there and get angry over things I can't change?

I can't say I was instantly 100% yippie-skippy happy, but I know the last five years did not look good on me. Sure, this new time in my life isn't what I expected. But...it's looking pretty good.